Big Shots"The Good, The Bad, and The Really Ugly"
Original Air Date: October 12, 2007
Shawn P - TwoCents Staff Writer
Previously on Big Shots, Brody’s sex night went awry (as sex nights are wont to do), Karl learned you can’t serve two masters, Duncan’s Tranny Hooker went bad penny on us, and James vowed blood vengeance against his cheating spouse.
This week, more shenanigans. Brody preemptively apologies to Lady Macbeth. James recounts his favorite parts of being newly single – cold sweats, missing his kids, and leaving the seat up with no threat of repercussions. Duncan offers to set him up with a Tranny Hooker. Actually, they lease him a Ferrari, to “loosen a few skirts” for James. Classy, guys, classy…
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Big Shots
ReplyDelete"The Good, The Bad, and The Really Ugly"
Original Air Date:
October 12, 2007
Shawn P - TwoCents Staff Writer
Previously on Big Shots, Brody’s sex night went awry (as sex nights are wont to do), Karl learned you can’t serve two masters, Duncan’s Tranny Hooker went bad penny on us, and James vowed blood vengeance against his cheating spouse.
This week, more shenanigans. Brody preemptively apologies to Lady Macbeth. James recounts his favorite parts of being newly single – cold sweats, missing his kids, and leaving the seat up with no threat of repercussions. Duncan offers to set him up with a Tranny Hooker. Actually, they lease him a Ferrari, to “loosen a few skirts” for James. Classy, guys, classy…
Karl’s homelife goes south; Wendy turns to Marla for comfort as she suspects Karl of an affair. Of course Wendy doesn’t consider the possibility that the homewrecker is Marla, because Wendy is a very thinly drawn (allegedly) comic devise, and not a real woman. Marla continues to bore the hell out of me.
Cam gets a job offer. Duncan’s still sleeping with his ex, Elizabeth. Cam walks in on them in flagrante delicto, but all I notice is the hat she’s wearing, which comes from the Thomas the Tank Engine spring couture collection.
James takes the Ferrari to the grade school to pick up some single mommy loving. Takes him about five minutes to get some digits, and another twenty to wipe the desperate off the scrap of paper said digits are written on.
At the golf course, word of Tranny Hooker’s big black book gets out. Lucky for Duncan, he never gave him/her his name, he gave Brody’s name instead. Cause that’s what friends are for... Brody plans to break into the evidence locker, because that’s can’t go wrong.
Karl and Marla argue over who knows Wendy better, and no one cares.
Brody’s cop friend wants Duncan to make his Little Miss Ugly Betty into the new face of Reveal.
The gang throws James a re-bachelor party, full of Reveal models. Neither hide nor hair of the cop’s daughter, though. James turns down a woman with forty condoms in her pocketbook. Good call, James. I don’t think forty was enough for that Petri Dish.
Karl asks Brody to photoshop some non-incriminating photos for reasons to idiotic to discuss. In the steam room, we get… you guessed it… more shirtless Malina!!! Let me state here that I still can’t get over Josh Malina’s musculature (although it mostly arms and back). Josh falls somewhere between Joe Piscapo and Carrot Top in terms of most disorienting people to accept as weight lifters.
The new face of Junior Reveal hasn’t eaten in three days. Didn’t take long for her to learn the trade, huh? Duncan learns Cam’s flirting with the enemy (Terrance).
James makes out with the single mommy, then tells her he’s not ready. Tease!
The shows goes homophobic in the Karl storyline, leading immediately to shots of Brody shirtless in the steam room. Can’t have your cake and eat it too, ABC!
Duncan refuses to be a booty call and wants to reconcile, Elizabeth says what will I tell the cabana boy? No, they make a date. Cute scene! Where’s that kind of scene the other 39 minutes of the show?
Duncan promises a better job for Cam, because she’s still his daughter. I think that’s supposed to be touching, but it’s just nepotism.
James trades the Ferrari in for… couldn’t tell… 67 Mustang convertible? Maybe? Someone help me out here? It looks mint, might even cost more than the Ferrari lease.
The black book gets stolen from the evidence locker before the cop could steal it. Cliff-hanger! Not really, but it does end abruptly there. Next week, more of the same, all signs indicate.
Oh yes, no one answered the brain teaser from last week (thanks, friends!). In case you’re interested:
1) Take Karl to the clubhouse
2) Return empty to the green, pick up Brody.
3) Drop Brody off at the clubhouse, return with Karl to the green.
4) Drop Karl at the green, pick up Duncan.
5) Drop Duncan at the clubhouse (Brody’s still there).
6) Return empty to the green, pick up Karl.
7) Return with Karl to the clubhouse.
Tiebreaker answer: Karl orders a seltzer because he drank three bottles of Boone’s Country Farm after his wife and mistress fell asleep last night in order to kill the pain of his existence, Brody orders a Zima because deep down he’s a sixteen year old girl, Duncan order a shot of Jagermeister because after a few of those the memories of the Tranny Hooker start to fade, and James orders a glass of 2% milk because that’s about as edgy as Michael Vartan can get without breaking out in hives.