Big LoveFight or Flight
Original Air Date: Mar 1, 2009
Thomas Nikl – Associate Staff Writer
thomas@thetwocentscorps.com
Welcome back, readers. Are you ready to sift through all the truly frustrating parts of this week’s episode of Big Love? I am! Here’s the episode gist: Sarah is still dealing with her lost baby and making some important college decisions, Wanda and Kathy are marrying Joey, Bill needs to get to the bottom of a document that he helped sell Ted, and Nikki and Margene are both losing it in their own kind of ways. Let’s roll.
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• Roy, the DA guy, Nikki’s boss- Why do you like Nikki? What exactly is it about her that you find attractive? Is it the prude, abrasive attitude? The 1800’s style of dress? Tell me, Roy, what’s your angle here, man?
ReplyDelete• Nikki- Can you stop playing the victim for even just half an episode? You started secretly taking birth control for three years and your family found out and they want an explanation and you have the nerve to flip out and hyperventilate and pass out? Are you serious, Nikki? Take some freakin’ responsibility for something. Can’t wait to see who you blame when you get busted nailing the DA. And would it kill you to treat your hair a little? Jesus Chrimoney.
• Question- how come every time we have a scene at the compound I hear cannons going off in the background? I just want to know- are there Civil War reenactments going on? Is there an Army base next door? Seriously WTF?
• Bill & Sarah- You know what’s a great reward for getting pregnant and miscarrying? A car! Good job, Bill, that’s some stellar parenting going on right there. Maybe I have to be a parent to understand but I think a tire iron to the face would have been a better form of reinforcement than a car. Even if it is an old Toyota and not a slick black mustang like your writer drives (true story!).
• Margene- Uh, dude, are you OK? Cuz you’re crying a lot. And dying your hair a lot. And now your weird ugly friend is dishing out her Zoloft to you. But, to be fair, if I lived your life I’d be depressed. So depressed that I’d put my face in the garbage disposal and flip the switch. What?
• Barb- She isn’t the first wife she’s the first narcissist. My God is everything about you, woman? Your daughter’s pregnancy? Not about you. Miscarriage? Nope, not about you, either. College choice? Not about you! Again, maybe I have to be a parent to get all this, but man is this one egomaniacal Mom we have going on here.
• Wanda- she is pissing herself at night. Enough said.
• The entire Grant family- Man, you people just don’t quit, do you? Messing up everything and now you try to kidnap Kathy before her wedding and marry her off to that freak show Hollace Greene (the dude who had Roman SHOT). Oh, but Kathy fights back (you go, girl) and stabs the freaky man-ish woman wife Greene with a pitch fork (Seriously, it was tight). But then Kathy gets in a little car chase, crashes into a pole, and breaks her neck. Now, that being said, there’s a simple solution to the Grant family problem. It’s called a silenced AR-15 automatic rifle. Bill should get one, then he should hop onto the crazy town Ranch, bust into Roman’s RV and pass a magazine of 5.56mm NATO rounds through Roman and his wife’s skull at a cool 3,200 feet per second. Then, Bill, you need to go over to Albie’s office with a fresh magazine- rinse and repeat. You can even wear a red thing around your forehead a la Rambo. It would be amazing for an episode to end with Bill going savage at the weirdo compound.
Oh man, sorry, I’ve still got Rambo Bill in my head.
Anyway, that’s the gist of what drove me nuts on Big Love this week. What drove you crazy? What are your clever solutions to Bill’s pesky problems? Until next week I’ll part you with my favorite quote of the episode:
“Nikki, put down the carrot AND the grater” (Bill, to a freaking out Nikki)
I have a feeling next week will REALLY make you cringe & pray for a Gun-Toting-Bill.
ReplyDeleteWTF is with the man-woman-Hollis-wife person?!? EWWW! Creeps me out every. single. time.
As for the car ~ that's always a bright idea: Give the kid MORE places to get laid. Brilliant. Then again, look to Bill's mom & dad and you'll be completely impressed by his parenting style.
Margene is one little blue pill away from blowing that whole family away. Maybe she can be the one to take out the compound!
Nikki is insane. And she talks to Wanda ~ 'cause that's a G R E A T pairing right there. The crazy leading the certifiable. Ooo! Wanda could take out the compound!!
Roy is SOOOO gonna throw Nikki in jail (at least he would if I was on their writing staff!)
I always thought the cannon fire was from their own target range (or something). It strikes me as the kind of place where there would be a lot of practice with big guns.
Did you notice that Albie's head witch-wife is Amber from House? LOL She went from being one witch to another!!
Haha, I don't watch House so I did not catch that... but man, if Wanda let loose and just decimating the compound Rambo style I think that would be even cooler than if Bill did it.
ReplyDeleteAlthough, if Joey is pissed enough, there may be some serious revenge coming soon.
Fingers Crossed.
I'm sorry about what i posted, I didn't mean to put nikki in jail. I didn't mean to say about Dylan Eunice Nikki and Jernic. Please do not comment on this anymore. thank you my friends.
ReplyDeleteMake more! lol these are hilarious
ReplyDeleteI am offended that you would produce the series Big Love. It demeans and distorts sacred beliefs of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I watch Big love Online By setting the show in Salt Lake City, it blurs the line between the Church and the long renounced practice of . Please cancel the show immediately
ReplyDelete